Here are dogs that are better dressed than you

Last October, I made myself and Ann go to a doggy Halloween costume parade at Thompson Square Park so we could surround ourselves with dogs. So this is what rich people are up to nowadays, I thought, staring longingly at a chihuahua rolling in on a giant princess castle on wheels. Anyway, it got pretty crazy and crowded quickly - small dogs needed to be carried so they wouldn't get kicked around and die. I mostly spent all day chasing around golden retrievers and big dogs because obviously the big, furry ones are always my favorite. I shamelessly took photos of dogs and their people, which took up an entire roll of film, just so I can do...what with it?! So I guess I'll just post them here. ENJOY



^ "What is life"

The anatomy of a sunset

The truth is, I don't really see sunsets anymore. But that's what you get for living in a concrete jungle, deprived of actual sunlight and an open sky. My favorite thing about living in Texas used to be seeing the enormous sky burn until it faded out purple and pink then dark blue when I'd be out driving in flatland. It was absolutely gorgeous and I still believe to this day that Texas has the best sunset out of all places I've ever lived. This weekend though, I got to discover the southern tip of Manhattan and the breathtaking view from Battery Park. I don't think I've just sat there and watched the sunset in a really long time...and there's not a moment it's not gorgeous.

It's okay to hang out with yourself

CUZ YOU'RE WORTH IT.


Number one lesson you learn in New York City is that you don't make pointless eye contact with strangers, no matter where you are / what time of the day it is. Again, I might be super jaded at this point, but no one warned me about eye contact when I first moved here and I can tell you from personal experience that it has done more harm than good. Maybe I'm just extra paranoid and assume that all strangers who smile at me are super creepy but trust me, you don't want to send even the faintest signal that you're chill with this weird, random, often slightly sensual nonverbal exchange unless they are actually David Beckham. Or Chris Pratt. Anyway, one other major reason I started wearing headphones even if I'm not listening to music and avoiding eye contact at all cost is because some people actually try to make a move while trying to convince me that I'm Asian when in fact that is literally the last thing I need convincing of. But super offensive and racist street harassment aside, it's just unpleasant to be bothered when you've had a long day at work or at the gym dying on the stairmaster.

Anyway, I'm saying all this because I find myself alone a lot since I moved in September. Big city can really teach you a lot about yourself and others.









But of course, nothing beats good company. I'm just learning to be a confident human being who is completely comfortable with herself, because I believe that a lot of our fears in being "alone" comes from our own insecurities. But that's just my opinion.




Hope you had a good weekend.

Currently listening: blossom dearie - manhattan

springtime blues

^ friday night mooooood. h/t my sis

I remember when I was in Korea this time last year, I hung out with one of my many cousins who took me hiking around Seoul. I feel like Seoul can be sort of comparable to New York, where any hint of 'nature' you find is backdropped with the city. Still, we saw little beautiful signs of spring popping up here and there. While I was gawking at flowers and blooming trees, my cousin told me something that's got me thinking for awhile: she said she always gets most depressed in the spring. Why? Because she feels excluded, left out, lonelier when everything seems to be finding life and moving on and doing great, basically. Damn. At first I didn't say much because I couldn't quite understand, but a year later, here in New York, I'm beginning to understand what she could have meant. Because like I said, Seoul is kind of comparable to New York in a sense where you feel like you can't catch a break. Ever. You're always surrounded by people, you find yourself exchanging unpleasantaries with strangers for no good reason and everyone is always going somewhere at full speed - literally and figuratively. Winter was a time I didn't feel like a complete loser if I stayed home and did nothing on weeknights. But now that the sidewalk traffic has quadrupled and I'm always side by side with strangers and tourists having the time of their lives, enjoying the city to the core, all that giddiness of spring kind of gnaws at me. Anyway. It doesn't hurt to set your own pace and live your life the way you're comfortable with. I needed some time and space and peace to actually enjoy spring...and just to chew on stuff, so I've been going to Central Park a lot. Sometimes I run, sometimes I just go there with my camera (and creep on strangers).






Of course I miss DC in springtime. It's really the best. Nothing beats it. It didn't even have to be near the tidal basin - around my apartment in Arlington, at the bus stop, on random streets in the city - the cherry flurries were everywhere and it smelled good. All of its beauty was so heartwrenching because who knew you could love a specific time and place so much?




In the past 25 years of my life, I've moved fiiive times. Five. That's not even including me moving from Philly to Korea when I was 7 months old. I'm starting to realize there hasn't been a time it didn't hurt. But it's also been really exciting. It's definitely painful every time but you eventually find a way to make yourself a new home. At least I did. Anyway, I'm missing the dmv a lot tonight - or more like this week, with the onset of spring and glimpses of cherry blossoms. I miss Arlington and all the memories and the way they made me feel. But it's not too shabby here either. After all, it's only the beginning of the season...(yes yes it was 35 degrees yesterday)

04// the paper kites - too late

I am definitely getting sick. I felt it coming when I tried to clear my throat after shoving a chocolate almond croissant down my throat during lunch. When it became pretty clear that it wasn't just the buttery pastry flakes that were clogging up my throat, I immediately took to the emergency supply of Airborne and throat drop I keep in my desk, but now that I'm sitting in bed at midnight, still with a sore throat, I do realize it is too late. TOO LATE. What more could I have done to prevent it? I wash my hands like a maniac almost every hour, I even wipe my phone down, and I try my best to never touch my face during the day. Ever. Plus I've been exercising almost everyday and trying to keep a good diet too. Thanks immune system. You had one job. ONE JOB!

Thanks to a lovely coworker, we took a quick lunch detour to the Columbus Circle holiday market to soak in the sun and a generous 50 degree weather before it gets completely dark again at like, 4pm. Did I mention New York has no chill when it comes to the holidays? There are holiday markets EVERYWHERE and it's pretty amazing.


Also, yes, I went to Times Square today. Why?! You might ask. WHY PUT YOURSELF THROUGH TIMES SQUARE OF ALL PLACES? AREN'T YOU LIVING THERE NOW? SHOULDN'T YOU KNOW BETTER? Yes, those are all valid questions that I've definitely asked myself as I dodged accidentally starring in the background of a group selfie while stuck in the crowd. I don't know. I've been feeling like I've been in a rut. Needed to do something and I work really close to Times Square. I like people watching, especially tourists, because they're usually really happy.

2015: I feel like I came to New York to grow up, be challenged and to pursue 'my dreams' yet it's so easy to get jaded and wrapped up in the usual challenges of transitions. This year was full of weird little beginnings and endings for me, and very few things felt stable or constant this year. In the midst of all that overwhelming whirlwind, I realize friendship is such a strange, perfect little thing that you can lean on. Whether they're old or new, the comfort, familiarity, moral support and honesty that they provide are truly an oasis. When you meet such kind people, even one or two, who want to invest their own time to understand and love you, you should know you are incredibly lucky.

03// absolutely no chill

I find New York most charming when I don't have any agenda. Yes, planning your day ahead is ideal, but sometimes you just don't, and you end up running into a lot of bulldogs and eat amazing food and somehow end up in the sea of tourists at the Rockefeller Center. This weekend, after walking around the Fifth Avenue and attempting to get near the Rockefeller tree, I learned that New York has absolutely no chill when it comes to the holidays. It's quite amazing.

Post-brunch ferry ride from Queens to the city (my first time! woohoo).

Then we headed down to Union Square for the farmers market + Strand (scored a signed copy of BJ Novak's book). Talk about being shoved around all night by an incredible number of PEOPLE. Holy moly. Again, Christmas time in New York has absolutely no chill.